this week: turning twelve times two.

images via [ 1 // 2 // 3]

And just like that, another year has flown by... can you believe it? It's time to pop a bottle and throw some confetti, folks. Granted I got a little too excited and started birthday festivities yesterday with pink cupcakes, plenty of happy hours, daisies and more - but, I'm beyond thrilled to head home (offline from work) this week and celebrate with my family in Portland.

What's on the agenda? Sleep, quality brunch dates with Mama Nguyen and a little spa action. Also - last but not least - packing for a wild trip to the outdoors of Victoria, Canada with my main squeeze and his family for a lovely Father's Day weekend. Follow along via Instagram for snippets of my deep sea and outdoor experience!

Thanks again to all those who sent some early sweet wishes, texts and cards! Celebrating for a whole week is so much better than just the day itself, right? :) Countdown to the official day of birth begins now... Thursday can't come soon enough.

Cheers to twenty-four and amazing, new adventures ahead!

xoxo

To get me in the festive mindset, I've made a "Birthday Week" playlist! Jam with me below. 

catching up.

[image] If only I looked this glamorous when working or blogging...
love the arm candy

It's been weeks... I know. Blogger fail, but don't you worry folks... I'm back! Trying my best to juggle work, a social life and of course, filling you in on all the details. As of right now, I don't have anything too crazy to share, but per usual, I'm enjoying Seattle through my gastronomic adventures - Marche, Cafe Campagne, Pink Door and Wild Ginger just to name a few. (I keep on doing some repeats though, need to be brave and try new places!) 

Realizing now as I'm writing this post that time has flown by too quickly. It seems like yesterday that I was writing to you about my first day in the big girl world; yeah, not yesterday.. more like December, which is 7 months ago? whoa. 


Here is what's crazy... it's been:

• 7 months since I finished school
• 5 months since I was hired onto the team
• ~2 months since Commencement

Life just seems to go by so much faster post-graduation... I feel like my life's been planned out through January 2013. Exciting? Sure... Weird? Most definitely... I guess it's just getting used to.. the adjustment phase as I'm ramping up my professional career. Hopefully by being more active on the blog (crossing my fingers for more time in the day), I'll be able to really seize the moment and "slow" life down a bit. 

Cheers to you my friends - hope you all had a fabulous and relaxing weekend. Here's to another week!!

the life motto

                                                             Source: galleryeight.blogspot.com via Amanda B. on Pinterest

I remember the day I posted this picture as my desktop at work. A colleague bursted out laughing... saying that I would be the last person to need that reminder.

Those two words - be classy - are more than just my reminder to behave in a proper manner aka not get embarrassingly sh*tfaced at a business function, swear in front of clients or chew with my mouth closed. Simple and straightforward, the phrase serves as a a standard, which I hold myself accountable. With each day, I strive to accept challenges with grace and poise, to embrace good and bad situations with an open mind and to welcome each person without preconceived judgement.

More than just two simple words on my desktop background - the phrase is a life motto. Forever and always, let's keep things classy.

Do you have a personal mantra or life motto that inspires you to be a better "you?"

Reasons why I secretly have "Southern roots"

For those of you who don't know.... I used to live in good 'ole Austin, Texas and Scottsdale, Arizona for a bit in my life. M'kay, I know Arizona is not Southern.. obvi, but it sure as heck got its country-conservative-cowboy boots wearin'- cactus errrwhere- and hot HOT sun that's so hawt you'd be needing gallons of water type of living. Oh, and most of my Scottsdale galpals ending up attending UT and TCU for college. I also have family who still live in in AZ, some in Dallas, TX and got a little bit in Mississippi and Louisiana. 

Well now, I wouldn't consider myself as one of the dixie chicks or one who has the Southern accent (yet, I do find that simply ahh-dorable). BUT I do think sometimes I belong down there where they all appreciate my love for Lilly, extra sweetened iced tea and Southern Proper.
Yes, my momma raised me on tennis skirts, polos, sundresses and handed me a rolling pin at the age of five. I ran pranced around in puffy-sleeved, brightly printed dresses with bows in my hair and loved tea parties. Still today, I enjoy all of the above but now will gladly add to the list my obsession with frockets and the love I have for my srat sisters.

So moving back to the Pacific NW had both its up's and down's. First off, I missed the rain. Weird as that may sound but the Arizona drought ruined my skin... it was just b-a-d for my skin and hair... plus, I kinda liked just turning on the tap and knowing that the water was okay to drink. Nice thing about Portland/Seattle, tall evergreen trees. Odd, that I like them... but they are B-E-A-utiful... so much more grand than cactus.. plus a nerdy fact - the more trees there are, the better the oxygen, and for a girl with a mild case of asthma, it's sure nice on the lungs. However, Arizona and Tejas had the culture, the food, the clothes, the SUN and the proper, conservative values I hold dear to the heart. As much as I love my dear Portland... it's a bit too hippie - weird - hipster for me. I tend to stick out like a sore thumb with my polo, cardy, chinos and penny loafers. There's only a small percentage of Portlanders (NW Portland) that get me and my momma... the rest are a little too "out there."

photo courtesy of We Heart It

"Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore." - Andre Gide

Back Where I Belong... Never Felt So Strong

St. Benedict's Chapel - Mckenzie Bridge, OR
 (April 2008)

Are you there God? It's me, Amanda. 

Yes, today's lack of creativity resulted in starting this entry like a Judy Blume book. Apologies if you're a bit disappointed. Hopefully, that won't deter you from reading the rest of it because today's entry is unlike my other ones. Instead of writing a simple chick-flick inside scoop to my sorority life or ramblin' on how much I love my Alpha Dees, etc., I'm baring my soul for you (for the first time, maybe not the last too) and documenting my "wake up" moment -- a coming-back to my true self, the old me whom I've lost when I first came to Seattle. 

....

Okay... so, here it goes. 

"Beloved: bear your share of hardship for the gospel with the strength that comes from God." 2 Tm 1:8b

That's taken straight from today's 2nd Reading (for those of you church-goers, 5 gold stars to the next person who can summarize the main message of the Gospel reading; *hint: Transfiguration). 

Hardship:

Well, this morning was both joyous and disheartening for many reasons. First, the realization that I was stuck in a whirlwind of confusion and disappointment became quite apparent over my conversation with a dear old friend of mine, Fr. Pat. How did I come to this? Imma set the context for ya.

Since pre-school, I had attended a private, Catholic school: Holy Trinity (Beaverton, OR) for K-3rd, Pope John XXIII (Scottsdale, AZ) during 4th grade, St. Joseph (Vancouver, WA) in 5th-8th grade and finally, Jesuit (Portland, OR) for high school. I went to Mass twice a week, prayed the rosary at least three times a month and participated in confession twice a year. I, being my mother's child, was close (very close) to God. Celebrated all of the sacraments, altar served, and enjoyed every minute of it. Being Catholic was very important in my life - it was my strength and source of hope. When I graduated from Jesuit, it was my wish to continue my devotion and spiritual life. However, to my dismay, college became a distraction, and I strayed away from my faith. 

This mental block/ "absence of God" phase was not ideal, obviously. Shameful to admit, this lack of spiritual fulfillment persisted for the past three years, and it wasn't until a couple days ago, that I realized what it was doing to my life - physically, emotionally and spiritually. 

Strength (fast-forwarding to now): 

It has been a little over three years now (1,095 days to be exact) since I last visited Jesuit High School, and this past Friday (March 18th, 2011) marked my first return since graduation. 

For me, it was the moment I stepped foot into the hallways, ventured through the chapel and celebrated mass with old faculty members and the students that I reached my "wake up" moment. 

That was it - this was what I needed.

My soul had thirst for it -- At that moment, time stood still, and nothing seemed to have changed. Just the people growing older, but that strong sense of community, it endured after all these years. For months, I had yearned for that feeling -agape - love and security - and that's what I felt at Jesuit, especially when I spoke those sacred words during Mass. I wasn't "going through the motions" like any other Mass service ( specifically the ones up in Seattle at the Newman Center - no offense, I just haven't found that feeling there).. The words I spoke - psalms, refrains, creed - it all meant something to me. I felt an overwhelming sense of joy, pure bliss and peace fall over my soul. 

I wanted it to last forever.

there is a light that will overcome the darkness...
 ACE '08 Encounter Love

"Wake Up" Moment:

This morning, I met with Fr. Pat Conroy, a Jesuit priest whom I deeply admire and had the privilege of being his student during my freshman year at Jesuit, for coffee at the Starbucks right next door to my high school. 

Laughing and crying, we chit-chatted about life after Jesuit - college, career paths, relationships and friends. Then, we got to some serious stuff; I discussed my faith journey with him, describing how I truly felt about God and what I was struggling with in my life. I felt like one of the lost sheep that I had read about over and over in Mark's gospels. 

With tears brimming my eyes, I asked him "Am I a bad Catholic?" I half-expected him to reply "Yes," and explain to me the many ways I could repay God for my lack of piety and devotion these past three years. 

Instead, he looked at me, crossed his arms, half-smiled and said "No." "You are not a bad Catholic, Amanda. You're normal and just going through that part in your faith journey where everyone struggles with God." 

The next hour and half, we discussed how much I missed God, the role He played in my life and how to come back home.

In those 90 minutes, I had never felt so uplifted. Just 90 minutes with Fr. Pat,  having an open discussion about God and working through my troubles... that was what I truly needed. Not one homily or service that I had attended since graduation could measure up to this morning's conversation. Because of this morning, I finally feel reconnected again.

More than happy to say, I strongly think believe that I have rediscovered Him in my life. 

It's nice to be back -- it's a good feeling - it's like I'm taking a bit of Jesuit 

and locking it up in my heart forever. 

The title of this entry comes from "Coming Home" by Diddy feat. Skylar Grey

And yes... my soul has finally come home.